The Enemy Within

By Tyler Bridges. Published October 2, 2020.

NEWCASTLE STUDENTS BEWARE! They are back and they are out for blood. They love to feed off the sluggish and uncaffeinated that drag their feet through campus, or those enjoying the well-deserved fresh air and sun. They do not discriminate.

You’re probably thinking, “But Tyler! It’s too early for mozzie season!” And you’d be right, if we did not go to uni in the middle of a giant swamp. But we do. We’re the perfect meal and Callaghan campus is crawling with us.

I was studying in the sun the other day on campus, minding my own business, head in a book. Lucky that book was big enough to smack the horse-sized mozzie that decided to make me its meal of the day. Sorry mate – it was you or me.

This is probably something you are so sick of hearing, but I have been on this campus for years now and I still forget to PUT ON REPELLENT! It is such a simple thing, and yet something that is so easily forgotten and so easily one’s demise.

I’m getting itchy just writing this!

There are normally a few places on campus that can supply you with the spray of the gods (Aerogard), but do not take the risk and assume that you will find somewhere to get it free. Get some of your own to put on before you come to campus.

For those of you living on campus: you are on the frontline in this fight, so please wear your battle armour! You aren’t even safe to duck next door, or nip out to the car. You must remain vigilant at all times.

It’s everyone for themselves, so if you do get caught, make sure you have supplies to fix yourself up. Sneaky life hack: calamine lotion. If you don’t come prepared with Aerogard, you’re going to need it.

Stay safe out there, everyone. This is a battle we cannot win – but if we stay alert, we can all get through it.

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